I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
