just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
