How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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