Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
