Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize