Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
