so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
My feet surprised me
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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