have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
The Olympian is in my bed
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
