but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
