As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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