I have demons in me.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
