Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
