i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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