How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Randomize
