Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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