There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Pooping to opera.
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