Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
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