And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I just gargled with NyQuil
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
false alarm, still single
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