The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Also, beer. Big fan.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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