i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
