are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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