he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize