You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize