Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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