well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
