Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
