i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
