They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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