So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
