Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I puked a lego.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
