Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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