I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
