Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
