I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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