I wanna bring you to show and tell
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
