i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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