Me. At least after what I've been through.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize