why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize