What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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