Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
you made out with another girl for some wings
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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