sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
