i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize