I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
