The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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