He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Randomize