I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
