TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
All I want is dick and wine.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
