your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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