I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
i now understand why vodka
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize
