No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
