Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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